It was the best of times, it was the worst of times… but mainly it was the most frustrating of times.
If you have read past blog posts you know that we had an unfortunate incident with a lunchbox a month or so ago that involved someone taking his lunchbox, shoving it in the toilet, & trying to flush it down. Don’t worry… the school assured me it wasn’t bullying, it was an isolated incident that was a crime of opportunity not targeting my son. Okay, I’ll buy that. You can read that post here. I ordered him a metal Dr. Who lunchbox to smooth life out & all was kosher.
A few weeks ago I got a call from the school counselor letting me know that while he was using the restroom he sat his bag & new ($30) Dr Who lunchbox down in the breeze way only to find that it had been stomped in when he came back out. They school bent it back as best they could & he was okay. When I got the call from the counselor letting me know I was so relived to hear that the school is sure that this was an isolated incident that was a crime of opportunity not targeting my son.
Flash forward a week or so. I picked him up from school right before Thanksgiving break & on the ride home he told me about his horrible day. He was headed to the restroom & put his lunchbox on a desk by one of his teachers room that is next to the rest room. This is what the school had told him to do instead of leaving it where all the kids leave theirs to make sure no other “Crimes of opportunity” happened. So this time someone went to the teachers door, got the Dr Who lunchbox & gave it another good stomping. I didn’t get a call this time because I’m not even sure if he bothered telling anyone because they have proved that nothing will happen. So as I kept my cool while hearing him tell me about how his most prized possession would no longer hardly latch I realized that, much like my respect for the public school system, advocacy at Shawnee Middle School is dead & gone. I calmly called the school that day to speak with his principal to see what was going on & why this was happening without anyone stepping up to help. I got his voicemail, I left a voicemail, &…. yeah that’s about it & this was before thanksgiving break. I have called two other times with no luck of talking to anyone & I’m starting to feel like I’m the crazy girlfriend in this situation! Is the staff at the school trying to tell me they don’t want to be in a relationship anymore? I want it to work, we’ve had some great times together! I remember that time we all had an IEP meeting in the library & everyone told my wife & I that they just LOVED my son! I remember everyone saying they would look out for him since he is vulnerable & I said thanks & that I was so appreciative! Remember that public school system? Remember? I chaperoned the trip to the zoo & when someone didn’t load the lunches I raced 50 miles back to pick them up only to make it back just in time for them to eat & you were so appreciative of me? Remember that, public school system? Oh, & remember that time we were laying on the beach & I brushed your hair…wait that was my wife… you get what I’m saying’? In the words of Theodore Roosevelt: Why ya gotta do me like that boo?
I guess my issue is… they kinda suck. Isolated incidents, crimes of opportunity, & security cameras that are seemingly never pointed in the right direction all make for a bully friendly environment. I mentioned in my previous blog that the local news did a story about a girl bing bullied by several other kids while filming it on a cell phone & posting it on the internet. That was at my sons school & when they interviewed the parents of that girl you know what they said the school told them… wait for it… wait for it… we are confident it was an isolated incident & not a situation where your child was bing targeted. It’s like they have a deck of cards with crappy excuses to tell parents. When a new one comes in with a problem they just draw a card from the deck!
The next move? Not sure! First move was ask nicely, second move was vent my frustrations to thousands of blog readers, third is to I guess go back to the drawing board. It’s just such a fine line because he says there is no one person bullying him but at the same time he is so oblivious to things like that we have seen situations like this before when someone is mean to him & he doesn’t even realize it. In rural Oklahoma there are not a lot of private school options (Ones that aren’t crazy religious or super expensive) & it upsets the hell out of me that we would even have to look at that option because he can’t get a fair shake at public school!