Well, we staved it off as long as we could. Dungeons & Dragons, yep we’ve gone there! Its aaaaalllllll over people, it’s done. We watched Gravity Falls & when he saw the mock version of it he looked at my wife & said “wouldn’t it be cool if that was a real game!” So she let the cat out of the bag & he did some googling. The next day we had a home made cardboard D&D with hand drawn characters. It was just to damn cute & it felt to good to see him so excited about something that is NOT video games or on YouTube so she loaded him up and headed to the comic book store. Who knew the game was $70 but once he saw it it was to late! Now the entire family is in on the game & we spent this evening after dinner playing. Sam snapped a few photos that I couldn’t help but post up to share. Not my cup of tea, I’m more of a Tetris man myself but totally worth it to see how much fun he was having throwing zombies at us.
We have been working a lot, it’s easy to do when you are self employed. It’s so cool to be able to travel to new parts of the country photographing weddings at beautiful places. Your business gets just a little popular & it’s super hard not to want to please everyone that asks you to do work for them but so goes life, we have to start turning away some jobs because otherwise your family life suffers. That being said my wife & I both committed to scaling back, re-centering, & focusing on being successful at home as well as at work instead of putting all of our eggs in the work basket. This not only means working less & more efficiently but also doing more one on one things with the kids, doing different things as a family, & of course taking more photos of them just hanging out. We photograph weddings for a living & one of my favorite things about that is the photojournalistic style we bring to it, just capturing it as it happens, moving away from the classic super posed photography. We both wanted to bring this to our home life so Samantha picked up the camera on our day off & used the day to document our stay-at-home mulligan day that we dubbed our ‘no work mental health day’. Take a peek!
Don’t forget we are now doing a web show over on YouTube & if you or someone you know happens to be getting married jump over to our other site Hibben Photography to take a look at our work…Yeah, shameless self plug! 🙂
We love Big Bang Theory! From the time our son was diagnosed we have always had friends & older family members who had a hard time understanding what was going on with him. ‘He’s just an odd kid’ or ‘He’ll grow out of it’ were common sayings that made us want to pull our hair out. Slowly as shows like Parenthood became more popular they showed some of those people what we go through daily people started to get it. Even more than the heavy story lines of parenthood, Big Bang & Dr. Sheldon Cooper came to the rescue showing the masses that these kind of people are not only productive members of society but they are awesome! It wasn’t just a win for getting people to look at kids with Asperger’s in a different light but it was a release for patents like us, a time to laugh & say ‘he totally does that!!’ Last night we settled in to watch the most recent new episode in which Penny & Sheldon do an experiment to see if they can fall in love by going through questions. Aside from the fact that the episode was hilarious there was a moment where he went all high functioning autistic on us talking about how he wished he could read minds because facial expressions & social cues were so hard to understand. He told penny he was envious of her because she could do these things so easily. While millions of people tuned in & laughed & laughed again at the antics the characters were going through I couldn’t help but take a second to realize that while all these NT people are laughing there are scores of parents just like us watching, welling up with a tears at the realization that it’s going to be okay that our kids aren’t the same as yours. It’s a big deal that the writers add these kinds of story lines. When someone comes along who doesn’t have contact with one of these kids & 10 years ago would have just written them off as an odd ball now they associate them with someone like Sheldon making them, even unknowingly, more accepting of our kids!
Is it a cure for autism… kind of yeah! Because the kind of cure we need is acceptance & awareness! Autism isn’t chicken pox, it’s not something that is going to go away after taking a pill or drinking a fruit smoothie. Granted there are a boat load of opinions on these last two sentences but even if you do think autism is something that is curable we can all agree that awareness & acceptance is always a good thing.
Just a quick note to say thanks for all the support I have had over the years with Adventures In Aspergers! With the new chapters we have started, i.e. pre teen & middle school years, I thought I would give the blog a face lift as well as update some things. A new platform, yep I’m switching to wordpress for all you bloggers out there. Also updating the name keeping Adventures In Aspergers but adding the new ‘Adventures With Autism’ as well. I’m not only adding it because it accurate but also because it will improve the sites reach. I started this blog as an outlet & it has been a great one but even more than an outlet it has been a help to so many people that I’ve been inspired to widen my reach & put out as much helpful content as possible. Everything should be integrated from the old site. If you find a link that doesn’t work or a problem or maybe even have a suggestion please as always just drop me a message! I love hearing from readers & I am going to be working on making this blog even more of a recourse spot for families dealing with autism.. All the old articles are still here, even your old links that you have ever shared are still live & work. I’m working to make this transition as smooth as can be but again, if you find something missing or a link broken feel free to drop me a line!
The sixth grade has proved kind of a rough transition for this kid. We have forgotten work, not moved quick enough to get things done, been overstimulated to many times to count but glass half full at least we haven’t had to worry about some of the crazy apocalyptic crazy thoughts that were in my head as we headed into middle school! Granted most of those were just worry wort dad thoughts & involved pretty much just crazy stories you read in the new happening verbatim to my kid. Every time I would read one of those horrifying stories about how a kid with autism was mistreated I just knew THAT exact thing would happen to him. So, like I said, glass half full none of that has happened! 🙂
What has happened is I got a call from our counselor yesterday while we were knee deep in the fall section of Hobby Lobby. (Don’t judge me! I gave up my man card long ago when I got a pinterest!) She told me that he had fallen asleep in second hour at his desk. The teacher tried to wake him up, when she did they said he looked around at the other kids wide eyed & confused for a second then crawled under his desk to the fetal position. He wouldn’t talk or make eye contact with anyone so the teacher called for the counselor. When the counselor arrived she told me that she tried to talk to him nice & slow for a second telling him that she has a soft bean bag chair in her office that he could come relax on. He took his backpack & headed to her office where she let him decompress for a while before he could even talk to her. She told me that after he started to talk again she assured him he wasn’t in any kind of trouble & gave him the option to go back to school for the rest of the day or she could call me to see about going home. He made the decision to go back to class. I’m so proud & happy that he made the very grown up choice to go back to class but I’m not gonna’ lie I wanted to rush to that school, pick him up, & get him home! Sometimes I realize that he is way braver than I am.
Going over the night before in my mind there was nothing out of the ordinary. Bed time was the same as it always is, reading books, saying good night, up in the morning like normal, everything was in line. Usually you can see these things headed your way but this one caught me off guard a bit. We haven’t had anything like this happen since about 3rd grade. I can even remember in kindergarden them having problems with him going under the desk to seek refuge or wandering the halls because he got out of someones sight for a minute but that was a long time ago! Time will tell I guess.I normally pick him up separately from the other boys. We pick up the two boys at the elementary & then I drop them off at home with mom so I can pick Jayden up just me & him. I took him to sonic for a green apple slush with nerds in it to ask him how his day was, he didn’t know the counselor called me. He went over his entire day with me, telling me how it was a good day with no problems at all! I gently pushed & pushed telling him he was acting like something had happened or he was not telling me everything. Even without the call I would have known something was up because he was obviously acting out of the norm being overly animated & evasive. Almost like you would see a character act when they are hiding something on a cartoon or kids TV show. I pushed one last time before telling him I got a call. I said ‘Jayden I’m going to order our drinks & I want you to think about your day. I know from the way you are acting that something has happened or there is something that has thrown you off a bit. Think about it while I’m ordering, maybe there is something that happened that you ‘FORGOT’ about. Either way I am going to email or call the teachers to check so please be honest with me & think really hard.” Sure enough after I ordered he put his hand to his chin like a sitcom character rubbing it & saying ‘hmmmm’ Then he said “You know, there is one thing I just remembered that happened today!” He told me about what happened telling me that he remembered being very sleepy & then waking up under his desk curled up.
I think band is keeping him somewhat on point. I’m not sure if I mentioned it in my last post, he was approved to play the drums. The snare drum! Yeah… Up to this point its not bad because I haven’t actually heard him play the snare, he has a practice pad that is soft & pretty quiet so thats a big plus. $775 for supplies to play the drums & we get Xylophone, Snare practice pads, & sticks but no drums. You would think I would be upset about that but yeah…nope. Lets keep the drums at school for now shall we! 🙂